im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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