so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
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