we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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