I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
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