It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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