Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Randomize
