Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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