Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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