its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
the room spins SO much faster in panama
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
