I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
