??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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