belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
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