You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
