so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
