I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Do vagina's smell?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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