the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
