69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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