well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize
