she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
