any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
