Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize