love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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