i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Randomize