Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Alive.
So much puke
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Text me some of your sweat
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