She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Randomize
