I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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