we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Im just a social blackout drinker.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Randomize
