So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
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