Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize