im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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