so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize