no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
