She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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