STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
