I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
