We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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