Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
