I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize