SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Life is so much better after having sex.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize