my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
If its not for food we ain't going out.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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