Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize