Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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