I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize