I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Randomize