there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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