Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
