Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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