ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
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