Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I fill condoms, not promises.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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