WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
